I lost my Dad nearly 2 years ago to Pancreatic Cancer and within months he was gone :( After Dad died it took a long time to realise he was really gone since he lived far away from me and I only saw him few times a year. My real grief kicked in when I had my first birthday without Dad it hit me then that he was really gone :( So it's the occasions I would've heard or seen him that make me accept Dad is gone :(
We scattered his ashes a year after he died and it was sad to see my siblings and their partners and of course my Mum with tears in their eyes. Dad worked as an electrician on the Interislander and his last wish was to be cremated and have his ashes scattered in the Cook Strait as the Interislander was a HUGE PART OF HIS LIFE. The ceremony was heartfelt and seeing the men Dad worked with have such a respect for him it overwhelmed me Dad meant A LOT to many people not just his family.
Today is his birthday so feeling a little emotional knowing he's not here and all my life Dad always remembered my birthday such a special thing to show me he cared about me. One birthday he sent an ecard with smilie faces and cool music and words to tell me he loved and cared about me. I have to stop here as tears a streaming down my face realising Dad's gone :(
Okay I'm good. Just want to say when someone you love is lost to death everyone grieves in different ways and for me when it's the times I would've heard from Dad like my first birthday after he died that's when I shed some tears but he was very sick at the time and knowing he didn't suffer for long makes me feel good he's at peace.
